How to be the 'perfect' bride

As some of you may know, i'm getting married this summer. July 16th, Bath Abbey, save the date! It's been a pretty hectic nine months so far, and i've learnt a few things along the way that i'd like to share with other brides-to-be. Numerical order seemed most appropriate:

1) Make it up as you go along. It’s what everyone else does. I believe the whole process, however much help you have, is designed to be a real learning curve.

2) Ignore all bridal magazines. They will only make you crave the ubiquitous and homogeneous wedding related junk that only serves to make your day look tacky. In fact, ignore most things regarding the popularised wedding industry, it is all far too materialistic. One of the most disappointing experiences of my own bridal adventure was my trip to the “national wedding show” in Earl’s Court last year. Between the ‘bridal confidence coaches’ and the ‘Dreamboyz’ male strippers, the only bridal blushing I was prone to, was purely embarrassment related. No one wants to go to the same wedding twice, and shopping for your wedding day at fairs like these will ensure that you will loose a lot of your originality. The same goes for honeymoon brochures. Y a few to spark the exotic imagination may help, but after your fingers begin to bleed by turning the pages, hell bent on finding the ‘perfect honeymoon destination’, it’s time to realise that over indulging in them will make you compare your choices with unrealistic expectations.

3) Disregard all comments that relate only to yourself, they will only increase the pressure you are already feeling. Reassuring yourself that this is all ‘your day’ is, let’s face it, really selfish, and will only mean that you are even more responsible for every detail of ‘your day’. So, when the flowers are late, or the best man is drunk before 2pm, this means that, as it’s totally ‘your day’, things like this will be horrifying, instead of hilarious.

4) There is no perfect groom to be. Remember, their imperfections are their crowning glory. By saying yes to that big, shiny engagement ring your heart has already made the choice to constantly forgive all annoying habits.

5) Keep on reminding yourself and your fiance that this is a celebration. When things get a little crazy, and the stress really gets to the both of you, make sure you always have an ‘emergency’ bottle of bubbly in the fridge. Cracking it open when your at your wit’s end (or at each other’s throats) will help to remind yourself of the joy that is found in publicly celebrating love and commitment.

6) Do a lot of underwear shopping. Let’s face it, there is nothing better than a) buying something pretty, and b) knowing that it makes you look amazing when you’re pretty much naked. Bridal lingerie is a work of genius. For me, bridal, and lingerie go hand in hand. A wedding is a perfect opportunity to buy something really special and expensive, and a couple of other things....and of course you need that silk slip....and three different garters, just to make sure that you have enough choice on the day. Most women I know would spend far more on the clothes they wear on show, rather than what they’re wearing underneath. I, however, with my forthcoming nuptials in mind, have realised the true importance of lingerie, and most importantly, the amazing excuse that a wedding can give you to shop relatively guilt free in that area.

7) Try not to compare. No one likes a jealous bride. Your guests are there because they love and support you, no level of perfection will change that. Make choices, and stick to them. Don’t start listening to what other bride’s have or havn’t done and think that you’ve made some kind of mistake. In fact, choose to believe that there is no such thing as a wedding related mistake. Only, wedding ‘alternatives’. This may include, forgetting to choose the order of service and leaving it to the last minute, no one will judge you for stealing the speculated Royal Wedding line up, purely out of desperation. It may also involve you never looking at another wedding dress magaizine/website, just to maintain your own satisfaction with your choice. Leave the stories of the women who buy ten dresses and wear one to the more eccentric/full on crazy of us brides to be.

8) If comparison urges do set in, and you can’t control them, then visit websites such as this religiously: http://www.uglydress.com/ugweddec.html